You see dAnkan walk over to a bookshelf and pull out the book “How to annoy a tech-billionaire into revealing their crimes” and sit down and read. Meanwhile, you take a world atlas and try to decide which country you would prefer to be a diplomat in. While your eyes glide over to the coordinate axes and you start thinking about how those actually work, dAnkan lets out a triumphant qu*ck.
“Of course, social media! That’s where they spend all their time, so that’s where we’ll strike!” says dAnkan while showing you a page of the book with a crossed out bird.
“Should we write some hitpieces or rally a troll army?” you ask, ready to go to war.
“What? No, definitely not a troll army. Have you ever worked with even one of those? An army of them would be awful,” replies dAnkan with a traumatic look in their eyes. “No, we can annoy him on our own. Now, I’ll just log into the account on the LemonTM computer here and…”
You wait patiently while dAnkan stares intently at the screen, not doing anything for a moment. Another moment passes before dAnkan breaks out into hysteria.
“Why isn’t it working! What has happened to my glorious account!? Oh the duck-manity! I’ve been hacked! This is collusion. This is corruption. This is…maybe illegal. If not then Santa will make it illegal!” dAnkan screams and jumps and in general throws a hissy fit.
“Uh…what has happened?” you ask confused.
“Someone has broken into my account, changed my posts, made me follow some weird accounts. If I could reply to them now I would disgrace the good name of Santa, so I’ll make myself scarce. You got this! Find the trails these evil birds left and make them pay!” dAnkan yells before slamming the door shut and going for an angry walk.
You sit there in front of the LemonTM computer, your orders clear, but you realize something worrying. You don’t even know the name of dAnkan’s account.